Cup of Coffee and Quality Conversation

Yesterday I had a visit with a good friend of 5 years now. We met innocently enough at a local coffee house (Café Roche) and talked over hot coffee and warm pastries.


We spent about 2 hours together and I left with a bitter –sweet awareness.


The Sweet – We listened and talked to each other. We asked questions to better understand perspectives. We recalled life experiences and things we had read or seen to add depth and breadth to the conversation. We wondered together. We laughed, debated and shared silence together. I left feeling grateful for the time and stimulated in my thinking and creative passion.


The Bitter - I don’t have good, quality conversations of substance nearly often enough. I know I am busy at work and at home. I know the trend is for 140 character interactions, online chatting, blogging/commenting and trite verbal exchanges (and I’m very good at those – I’m just saying), but I wonder if there isn’t more to it.


Have we somehow developed into a culture where conversation has been replaced with brief proclamations and affirmations? Has the art of informed group inquiry (was there ever such an art) become too complicated, too time consuming? I think one of the reasons that I love sharing coffee with others – just about anyone – is that it slows things down and creates a moment for conversation. It is hard to be in a hurry when you are holding and trying to drink very HOT liquids!


My life needs more time for coffee and conversation, more space for debating, wondering with others. What about you? Care to join me for a cup of Joe?

Dancing Death

The painter stands apart from the painting

The poet lays aside the parchment

The sculptor steps back from the statue

Each, in turns applies craft upon an object

Releasing it, complete and whole

They remain.


Where then, do we find the line separating the dancer from the dance?

Body, spirit and movement are at once creator and creation

The dance exists only with and only in a moment of movement

And in its incessant demand to be, the dance will – always does –

Consume the dancer leaving

Him draped across the floor

Her broken over the chair

Leaving them worn thin in each other’s arms

Only able to gasp a memory of remembering

The dance, only shadows of their life

Gone

Is the dance


As the dance continues upon

Another

one, two, three…

On Visiting Blue Hole - Bermuda

A did a piece of writing after hiking an area in Bermuda called the "Blue Hole."

The Blue Hole has an interesting history and contains some amazing submerged caves and private pools. One of the very few unsolved murders in recent Bermuda history occurred there, and it is the location of the oldest rock type on the island.

THE BLUE HOLE'S HOLD

Your now seldom trodden paths fall under new feet, withstanding each impact of soul and sole, bearing up upon unyielding and ancient rock the weight of another exploration, an adventuring spirit, another of the millions of creatures that you have felt wander across your very spine, and with thoughtless query your impatient question of 800,000 years rises again...

Will this be the one? Or will this be only another impertinent and transient creature that errantly uses the earthy mystery of this space for gathering dirt and stone, or ripping foliage aside for consumption, or splattering in fury, another's blood upon you hoping you will shroud its evil form detection? Or will this one impede the conquest and domination long enough to pause momentarily, stand still enough - long enough to allow your archaic message to creep from the core of this vain of our origination and stir as deeply within them as it resides within you, the tendril of impervious and undaunted myth that is your message?

5 Public Speaking Boosts - #5 Work

Doing what we like doesn’t mean it isn’t work.


I enjoy public speaking tremendously. Master presenters have fun, laugh and enjoy what they do. It is important to remember that we aren’t doing this just for our enjoyment, but rather as a means of work, meaningful work in order to share valuable ideas, concepts and experiences with others.


Public speaking is work and we do well to work hard. What are the aspects of your public speaking career that require work? Is it generating ideas, reviewing video for ways to improve, booking speaking engagements, website maintenance, or updating successful presentations? The elements of our activity that feel like work are usually the very aspect that needs out attention.


We must work at what we do if we are to become better at what we offer.

5 Public Speaking Boosts - #4 Imperfection

Excellence isn’t about being perfect.


The single most effective approach to engaging a group is to allow them to glimpse your flaws – with humor. An introduction that pokes fun at your accomplishments, some self disclosure about mistakes, a touch of self effacing humor or an acknowledged misspoken word will often put our audience at ease.


Professional speakers can seem larger than life and letting people see a glimpse of our humanity helps make our message more believable.


A word of caution: This is not the time to air your dirty laundry or introduce controversial topics or intimate self disclosure. If you we need our neuroses affirmed – let’s take those to a therapist and not inflict them on our audience.

5 Public Speaking Boosts - #3 Think

Thinking isn’t just for off platform.


While it is true we never want to ‘wing it’ in place of solid preparation, it is also true that we often need to allow ourselves to think and adapt. People like to see us think, so don’t be afraid to respond to a good question with a pause, some solid thought and then a casual answer.


As advanced speakers we are able to think ‘on the fly’ and offer interactive presentations rather than canned speeches.

5 Public Speaking Boosts - #2 Posture

Posture isn’t just standing up straight.


By the time we get a few public presentations under our belt, we know a few things about appearance. We know to stand tall, command the platform and to eliminate unnecessary or awkward movements. Yet, the master speaker wisely incorporates new mannerisms and gestures into the presentation to help deliver impact.


We need to develop a skill set of hand movements, postures, arm movements and facial expressions that will allow us to offer a variety of visual cues. One word of caution: I’m not suggesting we provide the antics of Jim Carrey, but rather that we be able to increase our visual offering when it is helpful.

5 Public Speaking Boosts - #1 Preparation

Preparation isn’t 3 points and a poem.


The running joke in seminary was that every good sermon is made up of 3 points and poem. The truth is it’s not a bad guideline for structuring a 15-20 devotional presentation. However, the problem for some of us is that when we get the outline done – we are done.


For presenters who have a natural ability to speak, the danger is that we might step onto the platform with little more preparation than an outline. I have heard many times, “I have a plan for what I want to say, but I’ll just ‘wing it’ on the details.”

No matter how good our speaking skills may be, there is no talent substitute for solid preparation: research, plan, practice and repeat.

10 Observations from Novice Yoga Class

Innocently, I attended my wife’s Yoga class Christmas party in December and found myself the winner of a 6 free Yoga classes door prize. Not to be wasteful, I offered the prize to her. Being the kind, beneficent and mean person that she is, my wife assured me that it was only good for me to use. Last night was the first “novice” Yoga class available since then, and I attended.


10 Observations from Novice Yoga Class


1. If I was 25 years old and single – Novice Yoga class is the place to be. 17 students. Two males.


2. Women KNOW men are nervous about Yoga. I’m just saying.


3. Yoga is a very personal experience that blends mental, physical and spiritual activity.


4. Yoga makes you thirsty – take water.


5. If I was 25 years old and single – Novice Yoga class is the place to be. 17 students. Two males.


6. Men, say what you will, but Yoga – even Novice Yoga - “isn’t for wimps.”


7. I’m already sore in place I didn’t know I had (or forgot about).


8. If I was 25 years old and single – Novice Yoga class is the place to be. 17 students. Two males.


9. The Yoga Gallery in Winston-Salem, NC is a kind place.


10. I’ll be going to all of the free classes, (and did I mention, if I was 25 years old and single – Novice Yoga class is the place to be).

Not a Relief for Haiti Post

I am touched by the tragedy in Haiti and the outpouring of support to those affected. I must, however, take this moment and stand on a soap-box cause of my own.


The current death toll is reported at over 200,000 with 1.5 million rendered homeless. This is a tragic event, similar to the tsunami of 2004. I have and will continue to offer my financial contributions and prayers. I hope you will do the same.


My soap box is that in the United States alone, there are over 180,000 deaths annually due to alcohol and other drugs (not including drug and alcohol related traffic deaths). The estimate cost to Americans each year for illicit drug use and related crime is around $65 billion.[1] There is numbness to this astounding reality. We don’t hear pleas from the White House to text for support, or celebrities and emergency response groups banding together to raise awareness and funds. What is more, how quickly would we respond if the technology and expertise to prevent the earthquake in Haiti had been available? Yet, much is known – both medically and socially - about the causes and treatment for addiction and those affected by it.


So, my pitch is that we must find a way of raising our awareness and response to a killer that surpasses the tragedy in Haiti every single year in the USA. At this point I would recommend a charity, program or group for you to donate to or support, but other than local programs – I’ just not aware of one good source to fund or support. So, search your local charities and give of your money and your time.


-Steps off soap box-

We now return to our regularly scheduled blogging…