Santa is Doing WHAT!?

Several years ago (I won't divulge how many because I'm not sure if the 'never talk about a woman's age applies to her, yet) my daughter spent a semester studying abroad in Spain (Yes, I believe she was studying). The Christmas that followed her return she presented us with an inappropriate , weird, ...unusual gift.

The photos below show the small Santa figurine, and yes - he is doing what you think he is doing. She claimed that these figures were all the rage in Spain and to her credit, I did find this link (which dates back to about that time).

Kids.

Redneck Ornaments - Two Dixie Cups and a String

Continuing on the Homemade Ornament theme, I also remember what you can make with two Dixie cups and a string.

Make a small hole in the bottom of two paper Dixie cups. Thread a piece of colored yarn through the cups to connect them (tie a knot on each end of the yarn to keep it from pulling through). Then, cover each cup with tin-foil and you now have “Silver Bells” to place on the tree – or on your ears while you run around the house singing Christmas songs – not that I have personally done anything like that – I’m just saying, you could.

Still Learning.

She said proudly, "I'm 58 years old and still figuring shit out."

I've said it. You've said it. "You learn something new every day." Today was the day my wife learned the meaning of Frigidaire. For those of you that don't know, Frigidaire is a brand of appliances that started in 1913 with the introduction of one of the first 'modern' electric refrigerators. By the 1960's Frigidaire became synonymous with refrigerator in much the same way Band-Aid is known for adhesive bandages. You would ask someone to bring you a coke from the Frigidaire. Most of us spoke of it as Frig-a-dare. The company grew to offer much more than refrigerators and the brand is known - then and now- as a manufacturer of electrical appliances. There is Kenmore, Maytag and Frigidaire.

Today awareness happened simply. My wife was letting the dogs out to do their evening doggie things and said playfully, "Out you go boys. Enjoy the frigid air." Then it hit her. The company was aptly named, for what else does one want from a refrigerator other than frigid air.

She said proudly, "I'm 58 years old and still figuring shit out."  

Yes she is.

Christmas Gift Ideas - Cat Book

Need a Christmas gift idea? Have a cat lover in your life? Who doesn't? (If you don't have a cat lover in your life then you must pay indulgences to @Lucy_Cat. It's a fact).

My friend and local (ok. she lives in Madison - but it's almost local) author, Dena Harris, has a new book (Who Moved My Mouse: A Self Help Book for Cats Who Don't Need Any)out just in time for your holiday giving.

Your mission is two fold:

1. Go buy the book.
2. Read Dena's latest blog post and tell her I said "HI!" (no i'm not getting paid for this, but only because I can't figure out how).

Wait...ok.. 3

3. Like her book on Facebook.

Go shop. It's Christmas time.

Garrison Keillor - Winston Salem, NC

Last evening I took advantage of a rare opportunity to enjoy one of the best story tellers of our generation, Garrison Keillor. The master of A Prairie Home Companion and troubadour of Lake Woebegone, Garrison Keillor knows how to weave a tale.

The Steven's Center was a delightful venue for the event. The stage front was set with a simple table, stool and microphone stand. Denise Franklin of our local public radio station, WFDD, offered a simple and respectful introduction of Mr. Keillor that set the stage complete with understated anticipation.

What followed was a well measured unleashing of humor, poignancy and inspiration as the baritone voice of Garrison sung and spoke story into our hearts. His humor was masterfully crafted right down to the black suit and white shirt that playfully gave way to a red tie, socks and sneakers: classic Keillor - refined and established tradition with a splattering of irreverence.

I had two take a ways this night: 1. Garrison's description of marriage as "A life time sentence to a relationship with your best informed critic." You have to love this. My wife and I looked at each other with instant agreement and bursting laughter. 2. The art of story is a dying art and if we lose this wonderful form of communication, if the digital snippets of media that bounce in and out of our awareness each day manage to capture so much of our attention that we no longer have the time or craving for the well turned phrase and a rambling illustration...then life will be diminished beyond reclamation.

If you have not had the pleasure of basking in the mastery of story as it is delivered - no, performed - by Garrison Keillor then reach out into this digital, instant gratification world and GET YOU SOME well paced, long rambling, heart stroking, laughter generating, life adoring STORY.

The Games We Play - Spouse Torture 101

About a year ago, my wife innocently invited me to do some 'shopping' with her. Being the supportive and mischievous sort, I agreed. Among a number of places we went was Idlewild House. It is an amazing place and if you are ever in the area, do drop by.

As we were getting ready to leave I spotted a small 'stuffed' bird on a shelf and something about it attracted me - powerfully. It was for sale and priced for only a few dollars, so I picked it up and walked with my wife to check out.

Wife - "What are you doing with that?"

Me- "Buying it?"

Wife - "I figured that, but why?"

Me - "It called my name."

Wife - "Oh. I guess you had better get it then"

Me - "That's what I thought. It's cute. I like it."

Wife - "You taking it to your office."

Me - "Maybe. I was thinking about where to put it."

Wife - "I think the office is a good place."

We drove home and the conversation about the bird continued and it was very clear to me that my wife did not want the bird at our home. I decided that our home was exactly where it needed to be.

So, once I got home I found a convenient place on a shelf in the kitchen for it. A day or so later, I noticed it was gone - but just moved to another place in the house. I moved it to yet another place - without saying a word - and thus began a game for us. For nearly a year now the bird has been moved from place to place, alternately by us. We don't say much about it. Sometimes it takes a day for it to be found - sometimes weeks. That little 'stuffed' bird has become an endearing and playful part of our relationship.

It is a good thing I bought it.

Here is where it resides today.

Look closer - yep, there it is.

You Will Laugh

One of my all time favorite videos. Silly doggie!

Yesterday at The Office

Nuff Said

If a picture is worth a thousand words, then this statue certainly speaks for itself. The title is "Man Carving His Destiny."  No comment beyond that is needed. 

You know you're getting old when...

It seems I'm having more and more conversations lately that begin with "I remember when...."

The latest vivid memory is of Major Matt Mason - Man in Space. I spent hours upon hours playing in the back yard with these toys, imagining space aliens, explosions and victories over evil monsters. Even with the occasional interruption to "wash-up for dinner," my days were all the time all the way Major Matt Mason!